A Birthday Reflection

“And Hansel said to Gretel, ‘Let us drop these bread crumbs so that together we can find our way home. Because losing our way will be the cruelest of things.’

This year I lost my way. And the way on the journey is unfortunate. But losing your reason for the journey is a fate more cruel. The journey lasted 8 months, sometimes I travel alone, sometimes there are others who took the wheel… and took my heart. But when the destination was reached, it wasn’t me who rivaled, it wasn’t me at all. And once you lose yourself, you have two choices: Find the person you used to be, or lose that person completely. Because sometimes you have to step outside of the person you’ve been and remember the person you are meant to be, the person you wanted to be, the person you are.

George Bernard Shaw once wrote, ‘There are 2 tragedies in life: one is to lose your heart’s desire, and the other is to gain it.’ Clearly, Shaw has his heart broken once or twice. As far as I’m concerned, Shaw is a punk. Tragedies happen, what are you gonna do? Give up? Quit? No. I realized now when your heart breaks you gotta fight like hell. Make sure you’re still alive because you are. And that pain you feel, it’s life. The confusion and fear? It’s there to remind you that somewhere out there is something better. And that something is worth fighting for.

This year I got everything I wanted and everything I wished for. But in a way, I lost even more. Shaw was right, as we strain to grasp for the things we desire, the things we think will make our lives better; money, popularity, fame. We ignore what truly matters, these simple things like friendship, family… love. The things we probably already had. Yes, losing your heart’s desire is a tragedy. But gaining your heart’s desire is all you could hope for. This year I wished for love; to immerse myself in someone else and wake a heart waited long to feel. My wish was granted. And if having that is tragic, then give me tragedy. Because I wouldn’t give it back for the world.”

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